hi. people call me scituate. you can call me scituate or scitch or bituate or tituate or by my slave name LIZ.

i reblog cute animals and tv i like and idk whatever k

 

finsterface:

If they don’t get your 30 Rock references, that’s a dealbreaker, ladies!

Anonymous asked
Why do you want to be a comedian?

bewbin:

the free stool with a glass of water on it 

shitshilarious:

DAMMNIT SUSAN I SAID GET ME THE EXPENSE REPORTS NOT SIT AROUND WITH YOUR THUMB UP YOUR ASS

shitshilarious:

DAMMNIT SUSAN I SAID GET ME THE EXPENSE REPORTS NOT SIT AROUND WITH YOUR THUMB UP YOUR ASS

fallontonight:

In honor of Washington legalizing marijuana, Jimmy weighs the good and bad of owning a dispensary!

oh god is this why i like american ninja warrior so much???

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Don’t put pressure on yourself. Life is just a chain of experiments and results, and you’ll be perfect when you’re dead.

 Dan Harmon (via feellng)

dajo42:

realistically the space under my bed is very small so if a monster did in fact live there it would have to also be very small

it would be some kind of baby monster

i would have to look after it

fuckingmulder:

Imagine Mulder and Scully at a restaurant. Someone starts to have an allergic reaction to something. The person they’re with says, “IS THERE A DOCTOR HERE?!”

Mulder looks over at Scully in slow motion. The music swells. Scully rises.

Her time has come.

She is a medical doctor.